Monday, January 19, 2015


I have an ongoing issue with the behavior that results from my husband's dementia.  I have little patience anymore and it is easily tested by me trying to control situations, prevent situations and to accept them when they still happen.

A few months back, I got a new Galaxy 5 telephone, so since my old Galaxy 3 was paid in full, I decided to give that phone to Gary.  Somewhere along the way, he lost it. (you can check the archives of this blog if you really need to know when....) I used the insurance clause and spent the $100 deductible to have it replaced.  Of course, when the first one was lost, so was the heavy duty "Otter" box and belt clip which housed it.  So, shortly after replacing the phone, I realized that he still needed a belt clip as that was the only hope of him not losing it.  I tried to save money by going to an accessory store and bought a middle of the  road quality phone case and belt clip.  (Lesson #1 of this adventure:  don't try to save money by buying lesser quality goods.)

There have been several times since that trip to the cheapo store that the phone either flipped off his belt or just fell out of the case.  Each time, he got very frustrated and had difficulty putting it back together.  Last Sunday, on the way to see the IMAX version of "The Wizard of OZ", we stopped by the Old SPaghetti Factory to have lunch.  The tile floored echoed as Gary sat down, the phone flipped off his waist, fell into four pieces, hit the floor and slid under two different couples' seats.  THe waiter was very sweet to displace the two couples, move the table, move the bench seats and crawl under to retrieve the phone, cover, face plate and phone.  Nothing was broken except for the embarrased souls called Gary and Ada.  (see last blog entry for the OZ story)

The next day, after getting home from the CLUB, Gary attempted to call me several times and was complaining about the phone case again.....enough!  I picked him up after work and headed to the SPRINT store to buy an indestructible OTTER BOX.  On the way, I noticed that he was twirling a Grape Tootsie Pop around in his mouth.  Not only did it smell very tasty but he was clanging it against his teeth.  I asked him to stop and he said "I'm almost finished, relax." 

I thought no more of it at the time....Upon entering the store, I was laser focused on finding the phone cases while the store employees focused on the current customers.  Gary went straight for the counter and interuppted the customer and worker to ask "Where is your trash can?"  I was hearing this but thought nothing of it nor did I hear the rest of the conversation.  Suddenly, I hear a shreiking and a "That is disgusting!  That was in your mouth!"

Apparently, the clerk had answered the question and continued to say the only trash was in the back of the store in a large bin.   Of course, Gary had finished the sucker, needed it to be tossed and had no qualms of asking the clerk to throw away his stick.  OMG. 

I walked over, grabbed him by the arm and explained that my husband has dementia and does not realize that his request is inappropriate.  She instantly got it and became a nice sales person rather than the screaming "Valley Girl" that was disgusted moments before my explanation.

As she installed the Otter Box, I explained to Gary why his request was strange and not acceptable.  I told him that the ladies at the CLUB and I often do things for him like toss out tissues, throw away objects that the general public just won't do.  He seemed to understand.

Its been over a week and the phone has not left its case nor flipped off his belt.  I should have bought the better product FIRST.  It would have saved the poor phone person the close encounter with Gary's saliva!

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