Restored....only in Heaven!

Gary sleeping in the quiet room at Memory Care.

Upon arriving at Gary's Memory Unit today, I walked into the main living area and one of the caregivers told me that she had just arrived and had not seen Gary yet today.  I went to his room and found it empty.  Where was he?

I found him in the Quiet Room with the lights down, waterfall on and aromatherapy machine misting some delightful aroma.  He was sound asleep.  I touched him and he did not stir.  I sat with him for quite a while and just held his hand.

After about a half hour, his eyes opened a little and I moved him into his room so I could trim his fingernails and trim his mustache.  His beard has now been totally shaved. He jerked a little when I turned on the electric clippers and seemed scared.  I explained to him what I was doing and whether or not he understood, he settled down. 

It was so odd touching his arms and shoulders as I was trimming him. I have touched his body for 32 years and the man I touched today felt very different.  His muscles and shape are gone.  He feels bony and weak.  A far cry from the man who could backpack and carry a 85 pound pack.

I looked him straight in the eye as I rubbed his newly cut hair back across his head.  I told him that I love him very much.  For the first time in months, he either repeated or responded a whispered "I love you."  I don't know whether it was a repeat or a response but my heart moved a little.  

Dementia, or in this case, FTD is one of the cruelest diseases I can imagine.  It steals the life and heart out of families. 

At these times, I can't help but wish for a restored Gary. Only in Heaven Ada....only in Heaven.

Gary and Ada on our last trip to Costa Rica about 7 years ago.