A morning of banter.

Here is an attempt at sharing the transcript from Gary's banter in bed from around 1:30am to 8:00am this morning.

"I have to pee."

"Okay, I will help you up.  Wait until I get around the bed. Okay, now, stand up.(I have to pull him to a seated position and manage to turn his feet to the floor for standing).  Gary, your legs are shaking like crazy.  How does that feel?"

"Really bad."  As the shaking subsides and his need to pee increases, we move to the toilet room.

"Gary, stand really close to the toilet.  Straddle it so you pee IN the toilet."

"Pee in the toilet.  Pee  in the toilet. Pee in the toilet.  Pee ON the toilet."

"No, stand still and finish peeing....are you done?"

"Yes, I am done.  I am done. I am done."

"Okay, turn around (with guidance) and lets wash your hands. Here, use this soap.  No, not on the toothbrush...on your hands. Okay, now let's dry your hands."

"Dry my hands.  Dry my hands. Dry my hands." 

"Yes, now lets go back to bed.  Sit down right here.  Swing your legs around.  (He is now lying crooked in the bed and I have to move his upper body over to the pillow so there is room for me.) Yes, I will cover you.  Okay, now lets go to sleep."

"Go to sleep.  Go to sleep.  There is a mole on my chest.  Go to sleep."

"Gary, stop picking at your mole.  Here, lets put your hands on the outside of the covers.  Now, go to sleep.....gary what are you doing?  Leave your pajamas alone.  ( a few minutes later) Gary, what are you doing?  Stop putting knots in your pajamas.  Go to sleep.  Here is Diva, rub her head instead. "

As the dog settles down and Gary is distracted by rubbing her ears, I manage to go back to sleep. 

This turn of events including helping him in and out of bed occurred 4 times throughout the night, once without him even peeing.  With the help of Nutritional Supplements, I have learned to go back to sleep each time except for early in the morning.  Then, I just need to get up.  Since this was Saturday and we had the luxury of sleeping in, I tried.

Around 6:30, after a round of the process outlined above, we went back to bed.  I held his hand and tried to return to slumber.

"Honey, where is Heather?"  I was shocked that he realized she was gone from the house for the weekend.  I explained and he seemed content.

Then, he started the following with no interaction from me.
"Alexander is my grandson.  Heather is my daughter.  Ada Mae is my wife.You just don't understand.  Turn the lights on.  Turn the lights off.  I do not have to pee.  Blue water.  Blue water. Blue water.  Diva is a special girl.  A Very special girl.  ...Ada Mae.  Ada Mae.  It could rain.  It could not rain.  Don't pee in the floor.  I can't tell.  I'm confused. 
I really have to pee."  At that phrasing, I arose and started to go through the get-him-up ritual.  As we neared the toilet, he couldn't wait anymore and peed on the floor and the rug leading to the toilet. I rushed him as fast as I could to the toilet to finish.  


I got very angry and started to yell at him and realized there was no point.  It would not change anything for now or the future and it really would not make me feel any better.  So, we cleaned him up.  Mopped the floor and put him back in the bed to watch television while I went downstairs to make coffee and tend to the dog.  Another day in the life.


Today, I donated his drum set to our church.  There was something therapeutic about tearing it down and putting it in the garage for pick up.  It is one less reminder sitting around of the man he once was.  At least, they can use it for worship and I'm sure that has some relevance to God.  He will like hearing Gary's drums played in praise.